God's love

I think I should clarify what “agape” means. Here’s an excerpt from Wikipedia:

The term agape is rarely used in ancient manuscripts, but was used by the early Christians to refer to the self-sacrificing love of God for humanity, which they were committed to reciprocating and practicing towards God and among one another. When 1 John 4:8 says "God is love," the Greek New Testament uses the word agape to describe God's love.

Agape has been expounded on by many Christian writers in a specifically Christian context. C. S. Lewis, in his book The Four Loves, used agape to describe what he believed was the highest level of love known to humanity—a selfless love, a love that was passionately committed to the well-being of the other.

The Christian usage of the term agape comes almost directly from the canonical Gospels' accounts of the teachings of Jesus. When asked what was the greatest commandment, Jesus said, "'Love (agape) the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love (agape) your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." (Matthew 22:37-40)

In the King James Version of the New Testament, the word agape is translated "charity" which has a contemporary connotation of "giving to meet needs of the less fortunate.”

God’s love was something I focused on for months this spring. A lot of that was sparked as I was eating alone on the night of Valentine's Day and felt so overwhelmed with God's love and was so happy that I cried tears of joy. It seems like there are a billion directions this post could go... I mean, it’s kind of hard to explain something infinite. I compare God’s love to the universe. The human mind is not physically capable of understanding the true size of the universe, or the concept of time. Scientists say the universe is expanding, but what is it expanding into? What was there before the beginning of time? It seems like every time I ask myself these questions my brain shuts off like it did in every Accounting class I had this year. Even if you simply Google “God’s love” and read other blogs and articles on it, they all seem scattered. How do you keep track of and define something that’s too big to understand?

I think the reason I focus so much on God’s love is because it’s always obvious if you’re willing to look for it. It’s always beneficial. Every time I’m on a “God high” or something like that, it’s like a snowball effect: something good happens, I thank God, I see God more, it seems like more good things happen. I see it easily in the things that I love: my parents, my friends, my dog, golf courses, the lake, puppies, success, missions, happy people, worship.

"Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love." 1 John 4:8

The problem is, if love is God and God is everywhere, why don’t I see His love for me everywhere? I’ve come to the realization that every trial I face- conflict with friends, feeling alone, being defeated by school, failed relationships- all make me feel unloved, not good enough. I screw up. I think I’m always right. I hurt people. I let myself get hurt. I’m not a good enough friend. I’m not smart enough. I’m not attractive enough. I keep making mistakes, over and over and over. Where can I find God’s love for me in all of that? How can something so big seem so invisible at times?

"But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8

Maybe these are actually the things God’s love is shown through the most. Sin was what He sent His only Son to die for. Christ's death was the number one way God shows us His love- it’s how He shows us Himself.

A song some friends and I have recently listened to a lot with says this:

“Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise”

I think that says it all.

So, this is why “agape” is the name of my blog. God’s love encompasses everything and every part of Christianity, which is every part of me. No matter the kind of day I’m having, where I go, who I’m with- whether it be incredible or heartbreaking- it’s all Him. There is nothing I could possibly write on here or experience that could ever stray from something to do with God’s love for me. Without God’s love, who would I be? If He didn’t love us, Who would He be? 

(Right as I was typing this, the songs “Our God is Love” by Hillsong and “Sometimes” by David Crowder Band came on my iPod. Coincidence is evidence of God’s providence.)